It'd been so long, I'd forgotten the feeling of being on top of the world. Things have at long last been falling into place a little. I'm far from where I wanted to be right now, but considering where I was, this works quite nicely.
To be honest, I'm adept at finding ways to make myself feel happy, to accept what I have as good, as perfectly fine. But to be honest, I couldn't really say that this summer. And I really had a hard time accepting it. I have this desire to be happy with whatever it is I'm doing, and there really was no way that I could do that. I was stuck in a dead end job that I really couldn't stand, a student without a school, and with no money. Some of my best friends were hundreds of miles away, and I realized I might not see most of them for months.
Dude. I knew it, but I denied it. I ignored it. I pretended it wasn't. But flat out, life sucked. Four months of the worst summer of my life. Not to be melodramatic or anything.
And to be honest, life isn't exactly ideal, anyway. I still have to pay off my books, and I'm probably facing a full year at CSCC instead of the quarter I was hoping for. I'm trying to claw my way back to Western, and there's more distance left than I thought. Though I have solidified my choice of a minor.
Still, I've actually managed to enjoy life at CSCC, even if it is just a glamorous version of the "single-serving friends" theory (I'm working on a separate entry for that, in fact, so stay tuned). I've got the glorious return coming in "a mere" month and a half. And I've totally got a hot date at the zoo with Maddie tomorrow. Heh.
So, here's to good times, and the hard stuff we had to fend off getting there. Here's a toast to all those who hear me all too well.
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